Friday, May 20, 2011

Sonohysterogram

There are SO many things I need to blog about, and I just don't have time to write these days.

I did want to give you all a brief update on my sonohysterogram (saline sonogram) from Monday, along with a really funny story that came from it.

So, the Saline Sonogram is not at all like the HSG, as I was expecting. During the HSG, the really uncomfortable/crampy part is when the dye gets pushed in the uterus and through the tubes, and that lasts about 30 seconds max. Then afterwards, you are drippy and slightly crampy like the day before your period.
Well, the saline sonogram was uncomfortable from the moment my internal cervical os was dilated and the catheter was put in, all the way through, and I was crampy for several hours afterwards. The procedure itself lasted about 5 minutes, but felt like 15. I felt really bad for my Dr (employer), because he could see how much discomfort I was in, and didn't want to hurt me. And in an effort to not hurt me, he didn't put a ton of pressure on the cathether, so when the saline went in, my endometrial lining just BARELY filled up and dilated. It was enough to see that there were no obvious polyps or abnormalities, though.

When the saline part was done, Dr B. asked me if I wanted to do the endometrial biopsy at that time - he went on to explain that it was not going to be any more pain that what I was already experiencing, and that the risks of the biopsy were the same as the risks of the sonogram, yada yada... all the while I'm crampy and uncomfortable and squeezing DH's hand. I was seriously about to tell him, "Look, either DO IT NOW, or GET THAT THING OUT OF ME, let's not have a 5 minute discussion about this!!!" (I didn't say that ;))

So, the funny story:

Before the saline injection, Dr B did a regular transvaginal ultrasound to measure the uterus, lining, and ovaries. My cervix was already dilated on cycle day 9 (with cervical mucus), and my friend/the nurse J was watching the ultrasound because she was going to be working the machine while Dr B did the injection. She asked why part of the image was moving and other parts were not. I told her that was bowel activity - peristalsis - that was moving. I pointed out the cervical crypts to her on the screen (it's WILD that you can see the actual crypts, where the mucus is made!), and she was impressed (she's a Practitioner, too).

Later on that evening, I was talking to DH about the procedure, and asked if he basically understood what he had seen on the screen (I explained the procedure to him beforehand).

DH said: "So, your friend J... she's a nurse??" He seemed a little incredulous about it.

I said: "Yes, she's a nurse and a Practitioner. Why?"

DH: "Well... I swear, she asked if that was the ass up on the screen..."

Me: "WHAT???!!! NOOOO I'm positive she did NOT ask that!! What are you talking about??!!"

DH: "Yeah, I'm pretty sure she did... right after you pointed out the bowel to her... she asked if it was the ass. I was really surprised that she would call it that, and not use a more, um, medical term."

I racked my brains. What was he talking about?? Then suddenly it dawned on me.

Me: "Wait. Could she have said 'Is that the os?'"

DH: "Oh. Yeah, maybe. What's an os?"

Me: "It's the opening into the cervix!"

DH: "Oh. OK, well that makes me feel better. Because I was wondering why no one else was as shocked as I was. You and Dr B were both kinda like, 'Yeah,' like you didn't really hear her."

This is the man I live with. I could NOT stop laughing all night, and when the next day I was spotting a lot and Dr B checked my cervix quickly to make sure I didn't have any active bleeding, I almost fell off the table when he said, "OK, I can see your os..." OMG, I will never be able to hear that word again without thinking 'ass'!!!

15 comments:

barbie said...

oh TICE that is hysterical!!! LOVE LOVE This story...thanks for the laugh!

Leila @ Little Catholic Bubble said...

Ha ha ha, now I will never be able to, either!!! (Not that I heard it a lot before!)

JellyBelly said...

So funny!!! I can totally see Mr TCIE's expression! Guess it's better to laugh about it, right??? ;)

Simone said...

Thanks for a good laugh.....It is amazing how every part of the body has a special term. OS is a new one for me.
Here is a good one. I was reading something medical about IF and I came across the word Meatus that is part of the male body......LOL
Your Poor DH, the three of you going on with medical terms and he is sitting there...It was nice that he went. I have had tons of US and my DH would never go to one.

Sew said...

You are such an OS. :)

CS said...

ROFL! Seriously!

Beth said...

HYSTERICAL!!!

doctorgianna said...

Lol!

Leila @ Little Catholic Bubble said...

Sew, ha ha!!!

the misfit said...

That is hilarious. My DH would totally do that. He listens very seriously to everything about the female reproductive system and doesn't retain a word of it. There are so many things we laugh about that wouldn't mean anything to most of the world...NICE OS!

polkadot said...

Very funny! It must have been nice to have your DH there with you during the procedure. :)

The Apostolate of Hannah's Tears said...

Oh my gosh, that is too funny. I can not stop laughing. You know you are going to just have to write that book S. told me she asked you to join her in the effort, I think that would be so awesome! The two of you together writing you stories ... oh my gosh, I just can't wait to promote that one!

Love,
Me

ALIVEINHOPE said...

laughing my "os" off!! : )

Kerry said...

I love it when guys misunderstand things like that!! Hilarious! Thanks for sharing! :)

Clara said...

That is so funny!! Great story.

I've been wanting to say "Hi". I started following your blog a few weeks ago and I think we go to the same Dr. I just got home from my Charting session with J.

If you want to email me, feel free to us the link in my profile. Otherwise I might see you around the Dr.'s office. I'm just starting the NaPro work up and will be doing the U/S series next month.