I'm way too busy to write a more thoughtful post title at this point, so I'll just say it like it is :)
Last night, for the first time in the 5 years we've been trying to conceive, I had a pregnancy dream. Seriously, I have NEVER dreamed of being pregnant, having a positive test, having an ultrasound - the only dreams that involved me having a baby were of me holding a baby that was already born... in fact, it was never really clear if the baby I was holding was even mine! But last night? I. WAS. PREGNANT.
And it was real time, so I was exactly where I am now in a cycle, on CD 8. My last period was a little on the light side, and I went in for an ultrasound to see what was going on with the unusual bleeding I had been having post-Peak (P+2-4). And, because it was a dream, DH was with me (he wouldn't usually go to a regular gyn ultrasound with me). Well, there on the screen popped up an image of a baby, about 10 or 11 weeks along!!! And not only that, but there were TWO of them!! I remember the best part of the dream being that, once DH and I got over the shock that we were actually PREGNANT, I got to be the one who told him, "Um, guess what, honey... there are TWO babies in there!!" It was surreal. It was awesome.
And then I woke up.
I was telling St Rita's Roses about it today as I scanned her :) She said well, at least if you never get to have that joy in real life, you got to experience it in a dream! I said, that's right, I can live vicariously through myself :)
Sigh. I would LOVE to have twins.
I did schedule my Clear Passage Therapy for the week of June 13-17. I haven't bought the plane tickets yet, but I plan to fly down June 10th and then spend the weekend before treatment going to St Augustine to see the Our Lady of La Leche shrine. I have always wanted to go! Well, at least since I've known about it. We'll be staying right in Gainesville, FL, so if any of you local bloggers would like to meet up, maybe at the shrine, I would love to!! Most of the treatment week I will need to take it easy.
The treatment will be pretty intense. Basically they massage your pelvic area externally and then part of the massage is also internal. (I was telling Sew Infertile how lucky my va-jay-jay is, with all these steam baths and massages it's been getting!) After the 4 hours of treatment per day, they send you back to the hotel with instructions for what exercises to do there. I have to drink a ton of water each day, since the therapy will be releasing and freeing up toxins. I am weirdly VERY excited about this. Really. I can hardly wait.
How far is June??
Finally, I spoke to my CA NaPro Dr (the one who recommended the Clear Passage massage) and asked her about my weird post-Peak bleeding the last couple of cycles. She said this does NOT sound like a typical detox symptom of an elimination diet, and that if it persists I should do bloodwork (already did last cycle, it's not falling progesterone), have an ultrasound, and possibly a biopsy. BIOPSY???? Here I was thinking maybe it's a polyp, and maybe I should have a saline sonogram... but a BIOPSY???? Great, now TCIE is going to have endometrial cancer?? Wonderful. This is what I'll be worried about all Easter.
Speaking of Easter, Easter happens to be Day 14 of my cycle. Just sayin'.
If you have an extra prayer (I know I'm overreacting here, but it wouldn't be the first time one of the IF bloggers was diagnosed with cancer... and one of my online friends died last year on my birthday to cancer, so...) please say one in regards to this whole bleeding issue, and ask God to please not add cancer to my list of ailments. Thanks.