Thursday, January 15, 2009

January 25th

So, does anyone remember my post a while back about the date January 25th? How DH was convinced we would either conceive or have a due date on January 25th (because our clock had been stuck at 1:25 for months before I changed the battery)?

Well, because of my whacky post-Peak phases since Dr. Toth treatment, that threw off the math to conceive on January 25th. But I just went to pick up my prescription for prometrium tonight, which the Dr wants me to take today (P+3) until P+12. Then she wants me to get a blood pg test on P+12. I just looked at my chart, and P+12 will be on January 24th... meaning I would get my results from the labwork on... JANUARY 25th!!!

Wild, right?

Of course, it doesn't mean anything definate. I was telling DH today on the way back from visiting my grandma, that when I talk about us having a baby lately, it seems SOOOO incredibly abstract. I couldn't find the words to describe it exactly, but I wonder if you all know what I mean? It's like, I have FAITH that I will indeed be a mother someday, and I also think logistically we will get there one way or another. But emotionally... I just feel completely separated from the state of "motherhood." And that really angers me, because that is the one thing I never, ever had a problem identifying before. Do you know what I mean? Am I explaining this right?

In any event, it looks like January 25th will be a day where I get some news. Only time will tell what that news will be.

8 comments:

Life In Mazes said...

I hope there is good news waiting for you on the 25th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have been battling some sad emotions lately in regard to being hopeful, so I can understand about the abstract feeling of talking about motherhood. I believe you are very close to your miracle.

Find joy in every journey said...

I am so hopeful for you!!!!! I would love to know that you are pg when we get together in Feb!!!
I totally get the whole abstract thing, I am making plans to get my home ready for a child so I can imagine my life with one.

prayerfuljourney said...

Is this the first month you are taking the prometrium? I started taking them tonight too. My napro dr won't see me for a pg test unless I make it to P17! I wish it was P12. Gosh....that's five less days of waiting to see if there are any results! I hope you get some good news too!!! Let me know how the pills make you feel. I've had some cramps and slight dizziness(the first two months on them). Just curious to know how they effect others. God Bless.

andnotbysight said...

I've been thinking about the 25th! Honestly, when you realized that the timing wasn't right for ovulation on the 25th, I was hoping that maybe the 25th would be the day you get a positive test and get to tell your grandma. I'll be praying!

Oh, and I get the abstract thing, too. I'm right there with you!

LifeHopes said...

I think it's probably pretty normal to feel so "abstract" about becoming a mother. I think it's par for the course, considering what we've been through.

I just know that when I become one, everything will fall into place, though, and the same goes for you!

Oh how wonderful it will be if you get THE news on that day!!!

Hafsa said...

Totally know how you feel, I was telling my husband last night that when I do get pg, it will feel completely surreal. I will pray for you!

tiffany said...

I completely understand what you mean about feeling separated from the state of "motherhood". To be honest, I think we do it to protect our hearts a little bit. We can have faith and believe in God's path (which itself can be hard to do), and we can be hopeful that we will be moms some day. But to actually think about what life would be like with a little one? Well I think that's just more than my heart can bear right now.

I will be praying for wonderful news for you on the 25th!

Find joy in every journey said...

I forgot to tell you that Jan. 25th if our last day of oral abx and also day 14 of this cycle for me. :)